Sunday, October 28, 2012

Healing.

I don't think people realize how big of a task that can actually be and I'm not really talking about physically. It is much harder and takes a lot longer to heal emotionally. The only way to be truly and deeply healed is to let God come in, open up those wounds and really clean them out. That is something I've only just recently begun to let happen, and to be honest, I didn't even realize I had never let Him do so. It's not easy; it hurts very badly, almost to the point where you'd rather it not happen at all. You'd rather suppress those feelings, push them from your thoughts, bury them deep down and hope and pray that they never return. But guess what, that never works. Those things will be brought back up in one way or another and that's God's doing, that's Him saying that you need to revisit that wound and let Him in. Go there with Him. Let those feelings of hurt and betrayal and anger resurface again, that's the only way to truly free yourself. He knows it hurts, He knows exactly how you're feeling, what you went through, the assault you endured and He's ready to take that pain from you. He's been ready since before the wound even occurred, He was only waiting for you to let Him in. It will not be an easy or short process, I can promise you that, but it will be worth it. Every tear will be worth it.
My advice to you is to not brush it off when you are reminded of the situation, or the wound that occurred from it. God will bring it up in many ways; for me it's been memories, seeing a certain person, old journal entries and now even old blog posts. Don't brush it under the rug as something unimportant or something you'd rather not remember. Don't make excuses like not having time at the moment, convincing yourself you're really over it and healed when you're not, or even justifying the hurt, saying you deserve it. That is not true. You don't deserve the pain inflicted upon you, that was NEVER God's intention and it still isn't now. That is a result of a fallen human race, living in a sinful world. God never wanted you to experience any of this. He loves you more than anyone else you'll ever know, more than you'll ever fully comprehend. So let Him love you and take care of you and heal you. Let Him speak to you in your most vulnerable places, to your deepest wounds and biggest fears. Only then can we begin to truly heal.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30

I cast all my cares upon You
I lay all of my burdens down at Your feet
And any time I don't know what to do
I just cast all my care upon You.